Friday, August 24, 2012

Fostering a Relationship with the Other Parent

How much is enough to encourage your child's relationship with their parent? 
The children's relationship with their parent is very important. It's also important to me to establish a consistent and reliable environment in our home.

It sounds easy to have the children call their Dad everynight before bed, but it's not that simple. I get home after work, we do homework, dinner, practice, and family time, then bedtime consists of time that I cherish with them. I love reading to them, I love saying prayers with them. It's difficult to do that when bed time also includes an extensive conversation with their Dad.

What do you do when they don't want to call their Dad?
 I don't want to create a negative atmosphere that is connected to calling their Dad by forcing them to talk to him.

When I call to talk to them, I dread when their Dad makes threats to them to get them to talk to me. They are still little and as they get older they will develop the relationship they desire with their Dad.

My little guy gets confused. I ask if he wants to say goodnight to his Dad and he runs to give Tage a hug. Blending a family is a lesson in swallowing pride and watching children open their hearts. They love their father. I can see them trying to figure out how to fit the love for their step-father in without offending their Dad.

They were once scolded by their Dad about calling Tage "Dad". And now I see them being so careful, and confused about where to fit all the people in thier life without hurting others. No matter what, they will develop their own life with their own relationships, however they choose.

They are very blessed to have so many people in thier life that love them. I told my girl from the beginning that the good thing about her Mom and Dad getting divorced is that she would end up with even more people in her life that love her, and a really really big family. Sure enough she has all of that!

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